Monday, November 21, 2005

Trumpery

Encumbered forever by desire and ambition,
Amibtion always distressing mind,
Mind If I talk to you long,
Long highway with desert around,
Around the corner of my heart, something is hidden deep,
Deep is touch of the heart,
Heart and brain can never work together,
Together we walk along the beach,
Beach, dusk and sea,
Sea, always annoying sand,
Sand castle and muddy hands,
Handful of coins and lousy rhyme,
Rhyme with beats and thoughts,
Thoughts of wonders and excitment,
Exciting dance and peaceful romance,
Romance and roses are red,
Red is the color of devil,
Devil will dismantle but angel will recastle,

Learning to fly but I have no wings,
Wings lost in the battle of heaven,
Heavenly ride with smoke filled clouds,
Clouds are watching you,
You and I, I and You, You I I You,
You better think of something,
Something becomes everything,
Everything is white, black and blue,
Blues are the summers and winters are cool,
Winter snow and christmas night,
Nights are mystic and I am thinking why days are not?
Not and can should never be allowed to mingle,
Mingling my voice with the song,
Songs are deep and end is never reached,
Reach where no one ever dreamt,
Dream is an activity created by the god,

God fooling our mind even while we are asleep,
Sleep is the worst part of life.



Saturday, November 19, 2005

Completing the incomplete

I think I am Dumb


I am not like them but I can pretend
the sun is gone but I have light
the day is gone but I had fun
I think I am dumb or may be I am happy

My heart is broke but I have glue
help me inhale and mend it with you
well float around and hang out on clouds
then well come down and have a hangover

Skin the sun and fall asleep
breathe away the soul is weak
lesson learned wish me luck
soothe the burn wake me up

snow is white but I can slide
picture is blurry and fog is around
time has stopped but I can count
everything is black but I am not sad

sorrows are coming but I am hiding my feelings
body is gone but I am feeling strong
strings are worn but they sound long
grass is moist but flames are hot

lake is idle and the moon is floating
winters are busy but I am too lazy
blood is hot but can is cold
life is fading away and I must live everyday

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Never ending!

Whole day, what have I done, DDP. Yeah! damn whole day and at this point of time, it seems that I am no way close to completion. Damn when is it gonna end? Nah! I am not writing any more because this mind is full of java, .net, c#. Nothing is coming to my mind, it seems I have stopped thinking, only ddp is swaying my mind. floating in my head. I can feel it. Oh hell! ddp has taken over my mind.

luulllllla lllliiiiiiiiiiiiiilllllll lllaaaammmmmbaaa
luuummmmmbaaa laaaaallllllllla lllllllliiiiiiiillllllllliiiiiiiiii
hmhmmmmmhhmhmh haaaahaaahaaah heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
hhoooohheeeeeeoohhhho hhhmmooommhhhhoommmmmooooo
fffooooooooofffuuuuuuuuu gggiiiiiiiirrrrrrriiiiiii
ssssuuuuuuuukkkkkk mmmiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
ffooooooooooooouuuuuuuuu

Read the above crap and temme how does it sound? I am too tired to try out myself so help me with it. Fading to black. Total black out. My neurons are losing their capacity to work and I dont want to bother them any more. I played, so far the best, fade to black today and I am trying hard to overcome my inability to make pleasant sound with guitar. When am I going to play Stairway to heaven like jimmy page (too ambitious ehh) . Who cares. Dreaming? Nah I am not dreaming, I call it process of thinking, cognition. Its moulding your mind to attain ambitious heights. So your mind starts working towards it since the time you think of it. Now I am running out of time, thoughts, words, water, food, energy and mentos.

At the end of the day and begining of the night
Green Day sucks! (No variety at all, same punk rock, every song sounds like the same)
Tea is the only thing keeping me alive and awake.
Free Bird! I cant change, god knows I cant change.
I am no nerd, If I was one then rather than writing this I would be sleeping tonite.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Sunscreen

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’97... wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance.

Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them. Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

12th November

12th Nov 83, thats the day I was born. The time was around 1240 hrs which I got to know yesterday only, anyways who cares for the time. One special day in a year. Getting calls, mails, sms from friends, relatives and unknowns. (I hate making complete sentences. Oops last one was the complete sentences and this ones too.) Surprise frm friends, as they say "in appreciation of the year round entertainment provided by me" (Yeah! I deserved it). Kurt Cobain journals. I am goin to become freaking crazy by reading all this but I loved the gift! ....(I hate writing straight sentences, whats the point in writing straight meaningful sentence which even a 10 yr old kid can understand.) My parents threw party at home, while I was here in Mumbai(shheh! missed it :-( ). Dry day (That sucked!). Had last bumps session in IIT and was alive after that :-) . My ass is fine now :-) (Thats one advantage of having lanky body, otherwise situation could have been worse :-) ). Btw Nov-ember, so is it like people born in nov are hot!?


Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Rat race

I dont want to indulge in any kind of rat race. I want a break, peaceful vacation after IIT. May be a year long internship somewhere in Europe, Ahh! Amsterdam will be a great place to live in :-). But I know I will not even apply, fuck these worldly matters, these social bindings, these obligations, these commitments. Cant get away from them and they will not leave you until you leave this world. By the end of this academic year, I'll be leaving one rat race and joining another (hopefully). I'll participate and try my best to win this race but with my own pace. I will not go beyond my limits under influence of any damn thing on this planet. Will I be able maintain this pace? Will my ego allow me to do that? I dont know but atleast I can give it a try. I should better stop writing now and do my ddp. I want to complete this rat race in time.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

DDPasstime

Spent whole day, scratching my head, thinking what to do? where to start from? trying to configure web server (yuck!). Saturday dedicated to DDP. Finally managed to do something :-) . Got actuarial exam on 15th and project report submission on 21st. Next couple of weeks are goin to be tough and exciting. DDP blues :-( .

Here is a very interesting link for rock freaks.
http://starling.rinet.ru/music/index.htm

Pick of the day : Within Attraction by Yanni. Awesome music, especially violin in the end. Violin, I didnt know they can sound that great :-) .